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The Game of Give and Receive

Many performers who sing in front of an audience have a fear of “breaking down” emotionally while singing.  In deed, it has happened to me a few times, and it trashes the voice, so it is something singers usually try to avoid.  The usual way that voice teachers coach their students to avoid getting emotional to the point of crying while singing is to repeat the song so many times that the emotion no longer has as strong a “pull.”   I have recently discovered a different way to think of this whole dilemma, but it doesn’t only apply to stage performers and church singers.  Any singer can use this!

In the game of Give and Receive, someone has to give, that is, release something, and someone has to receive  something.  In this game, the agreement is that the singer gives the voice and the emotional communication, and that the listener receives these.  Here’s how the emotional part works:  what if the emotion isn’t “yours,” like a possession that belongs to you?  What if emotions, because they aren’t a thing, like an object you can touch or hold, are universal?  They are everywhere, at all times, and we just pass them around and feel them and talk about them, but everyone has the same access to them.  If so, when you sing, your job is to make the listener feel something.  If the emotion you are trying to communicate gets “stuck” with you, in your throat and tears, you are being the receiver and doing the audiences’ job in the Give and Receive game.  What if you just made the emotion real for them and gave it away to them as the audience?  The more you give away the emotion, and focus on the listener, instead of yourself, the more the emotion is received by the listener.  Try it!  It’s easier to give it away than it is to get stuck with it.

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